How to hold grief in a black body when that very black body is often what causes you grief (A VERY LONG ESSAY. I WROTE TODAY ABOUT LIVING IN A NEW AREA SORRY IN ADVANCE HAHA)

feel free to read or scroll on by- just wanted to put my thoughts…

Like many Christian orgasms, mine was hesitant and dredged in uncertainty.

Well, dredged wasn’t the best term for this. I didn’t batter up my shame and fry it piping hot. The air did feel heavy, though, as I stared at his clock and tried to count milliseconds.

How many times…

My parents are committed to the quest of perfection even though they probably don’t know it. They’d never say that they want their children to be perfect, even though they show us.

2018 Family Photo.

“We love you guys no matter what,” they’d told us growing up, with their thick accents punctuating the…

In the digital, I am beautiful.

I am 500 right swipes in 18 days.

I am a question of “is this algorithm working right?” and “oh — it is working right?” and “oh.”

I am a question of, “how can I be swipable and approachable and 691-matches-in-7-months beautiful

when I…

I think about being attractive a lot.

I don’t do so because I am vain (although, don’t get it twisted — I am vain. By popular standards and the Christian Ethic I somewhat affirm, having 693 selfies stored in the ‘Favorites’ album of my iPhone is a little much).

I…

(uh-kwee-yah)

I write when I’m stressed!!!!!

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store